divine angst

Look, I respect that Nikki Cox has a fine pair of tatas. But could she PLEASE, in just ONE EPISODE, COVER THEM UP?

And oh my GOD, she’s YOUNGER than me. That’s just depressing.

Got my GULC letter today. They do not want me. An outright rejection.

Honestly, I was expecting to be put on the waitlist.

I’m not upset; that’s not the right word. I’m disappointed, a little surprised, sort of annoyed. But I wasn’t really all that excited about Georgetown. I spent a lot of time rehearsing the reasons I could be happy there in my mind, but I’m not sure I ever believed myself.

I’m glad all my decisions are in, and that I am not on any waitlists. I’m glad our decision-making process won’t be strung out any longer than necessary, as it might have been had I hit the waitlist. I’m glad my part of this grand life change is over. I know what schools I can choose between so I can start seriously considering what’s important to me and what isn’t.

You might notice that I’ve removed my list of schools from the sidebar. If you’ve been reading, you know where I got in (if you haven’t, you can always look it up). I think I’ve decided that, when we decide where we’re going, I’m not going to disclose the name of my school. Obviously, if you’ve been reading, you’ll be able to guess pretty readily (if you haven’t, you can always search). I’d like to hold on to whatever shred of anonymity I still have, at least until I settle in wherever I land.

If you’re pre-law and tired of the admissions nightmare; if you’re a student and tired of classes or exams, or you’re out in the “real world” and you’re just tired of the daily grind, take a gander at this post about a Senegalese wedding—written by my friend Clare who is in the Peace Corps over there:

However, I’m very relieved that it’s over: those were two days of more being stared at, asked for everything ranging from money to clothes to my headlamp, and called “Whitey” in my own home than I’ve had to deal with in the past two months. And while I can appreciate the cross-cultural absurdity, shall we say, of having a circle of two dozen girls staring at me as though they expected purple monsters to sprout out of my head, or of making babies burst into tears of abject terror by simply looking at them… it’s still. gets. tiring.

I like Clare’s blog because it always brings me back to earth. She is having an incredible experience, half a world away, and she’s not just getting through the cultural experience but she’s also getting work done (or trying to!). My worries seem sort of unimportant compared to being felt up by a small girl who is astonished at the color of your skin—and who probably also keeps calling you “Whitey.”

HL1440 has a nice little post about deadlines and seat deposits and it’s making my stomach hurt.

We don’t have all our information yet. We can’t even begin to have a serious conversation about where we’re going to end up until we both know where we can end up.

It’s looking more and more like I’m going to have to deposit at more than one place, unless a miracle happens and we get all of our information TOMORROW. (Psst: if our schools are listening, please send stuff NOW.) I admit I’m in a better spot than HL1440—he’s still waiting on many schools’ decisions whereas I know my decisions have been made. But Mr. Angst isn’t, and that makes things a little trickier, since there are two of us. (In HL1440’s case, there are two of them, also—his girlfriend is going to graduate school. But they seem to be entertaining the possibility of being in different places this fall. We’re not.)

Why do schools extend their decision-making out for so long when they know students have to send in seat deposits? They have to know that stretching things out for so long means more students will double-deposit. Double deposits may mean more money for the schools, but only at the expense of having to deal with more paperwork when they have to fill a late-summer empty spot. (It also increases student anxiety, probably not a good thing.) I also don’t understand, really, how the waitlist thing ever works. I simply cannot imagine changing my entire plan a week before school starts. That’s maybe just ME, but yeesh! Once I make a decision, I’m going to try as hard as I can to be happy with it. Pinning my late-summer hopes on getting off a wait list seems like a BIG waste of energy.

So for now, I’m ignoring the (short) stack of deposit slips. Instead, I’m getting up early to clean our bedroom and make the bed, empty the garbage, give the kitchen a once-over. Focusing on the house is so much easier. I should have switched my attention weeks ago.