divine angst

Via Amber, the eye meme. I think I was telling a good story when this was taken.

Entertainment Weekly’s review of Britneys’ reality show made my afternoon. Some faves:

“At one point, after seeing paparazzi outside her window, she declares—with what she intends to be knowing bravado—’People can take anything away from you, but they can’t take your truth. Can you handle my truth?’ And then she swings the camera around to the makeup table in front of her and squeals, ‘I got pretty glitter over there!’”

“Let’s take the moment when she focused the camera on her knees and said, ”They look just like boobs. But they’re not. They’re my knees!” and then shrieked with laughter.”

“Were I not too busy throwing bricks at my TV, I would have clapped with delight as she attempted to interpret a painting but ended up making it—just as she had everything else—about her. If you showed her a painting of Dali’s melting clocks, she would say, ‘This one makes me cry. Time is getting all gooey because I’m late and the world is sad.’”

And the best of all:

“Does anyone remember when Barbra Streisand made that music video of her duet with her then boyfriend Don Johnson, ”Till I Loved You,” where at the end they both giggled and nuzzled a little bit? That was only three minutes long, and I’ll bet Barbra has anyone flogged who even hums that song in her presence now.”

I might have to watch Chaotic now, just for the laughing.

I think I ate something bad on Monday night, because yesterday, my stomach was NOT settled. I felt pretty crappy all day long—and my office was freezing. You know how your body tenses up when you don’t feel good? And how your body tenses up when you are too cold? Yeah? Add them together, and the effects don’t simply double. The discomfort is exponential. By 3:00 I felt like I was going to die.

But I didn’t go home, despite having something close to four weeks of sick leave. Why? I’ve taken two “exhaustion days” in the last two weeks (both related to moving and selling things) and I didn’t want to take more sick time so soon.

Is that silly? I know I’m valued here, but I don’t want to seem like I’m slacking off with two and a half months to go. The reality is that I didn’t get much done yesterday afternoon because I felt so crappy. I should have gone home. In fact, when I did go home, at the normal time, I bundled up into a long-sleeved t-shirt, pajama pants, and socks, and buried myself under the sheets and the comforter. And I passed out.

A sweet two-hour nap later, I got up, dizzy as all get-out because I hadn’t eaten much all day. Forced a sammich into my body and went back to sleep. And you know what? I feel TERRIFIC today. Absolutely fan-friggin-tastic. Sleep really is the wonder drug.

From Jack and Coke.

“The German air controllers at Frankfurt Airport are renowned as a short-tempered lot. They not only expect one to know one’s gate parking location, but how to get there without any assistance from them.

So it was with some amusement that we (a Pan Am 747) listened to the following exchange between Frankfurt ground control and a British Airways 747, call sign Speedbird 206.

Speedbird 206: “Frankfurt, Speedbird 206 clear of active runway.”

Ground: “Speedbird 206 Taxi to gate Alpha One-Seven.”

The BA 747 pulled onto the main taxiway and slowed to a stop.

Ground: “Speedbird, do you not know where you are going?”

Speedbird 206: “Stand by, Ground, I’m looking up our gate location now.”

Ground (with quite arrogant impatience): “Speedbird 206, have you not been to Frankfurt before?”

Speedbird 206 (coolly): “Yes, twice in 1944, but it was dark, — And I didn’t land”