divine angst

Without fanfare, here are Friday’s questions, courtesy BTQ:

1. What is the earliest movie you remember watching in the theater?

Honestly? Triumph of the Ewoks. (Oh, wait, that wasn’t the name of that movie? You want to know what’s saddest about the fact that this was the first movie I clearly recall seeing in the theater? It was the fact that, besides the Ewoks, of course, the biggest thing I remember was Luke and Leia finding out they were siblings. Isn’t that a weird thing to remember?)

2. If you could strike one word from the English language, which word would you choose and why?

See, you ask these questions, but I never can come up with these sorts of answers on the spot. I’d be more likely to scream out a shitty word while driving in traffic or watching Everybody Loves Raymond. Still, I guess I should pull an answer out of…somewhere. How about smegma?

3. If you were a superhero, what would be your kryptonite?

Bad grammar? Putting apostrophes after plural non-possessives? Misspelling the name of a major award?

4. Would you rather win an Emmy, Grammy, Tony, Golden Globe, Oscar, Pulitzer, or Noble Prize? What work would you win it for?

I want the Noble Prize. For being noble in the face of overwhelming opportunities to cat on someone or something for doing something tacky. Or for using bad grammar. Yeah, that’s the ticket. I’ll rack up a tremendous record of NOT snarking on people for inflicting me with bad grammar, poorly used apostrophes, and misspellings. And my nobility will impress the world and they’ll give me the Noble Prize.

5. What is your catch phrase? Don’t have one? Then make one up!

Well, at work, they used to think it was, “I can live with that,” but I was asked to stop saying that because it sounded “negative.”