divine angst

Things I’ve noticed this week:

1) My cashier at the breakfast spot in my building wears a kabbalah bracelet.
2) My shoes squeak with every step.
3) There are not enough hours in the day.

That last one is all about how much I have to do in the next few days–and how unlikely it is that any of it will get done. I am very close to being done with this round of journal duties (just in time for new ones, yay!), but then I’ll have to spend the entire weekend packing our apartment. (Yes, of course Mr. Angst will be helping. I just tend to take on these kinds of responsibilities, even when I perhaps should be comfortable not Doing It All Myself.)

I know that the next, oh, ten days will be really busy and stressful and probably hard. But at the end of it, we’ll be in a new and improved apartment, my big stressful journal duties will be past (for the time), and the bulk of the summer will still stretch before me. Oh, I hope, I hope.

Um, yeah.^[1]

1. Warning: law student nerdy humor. ↩

In addition to taking advantage of the available car this weekend to move a small load of fragiles to the new apartment, we also took advantage of it to pick up the furniture we had been planning to buy. We had wanted matching living room furniture–the wood stuff, not the upholstered stuff. (I.e., no couches and chairs.)

So a month or so ago, we had looked into buying some new furniture, and found a set we liked at Crate & Barrel. Best of all, the stuff we liked was the “ready to assemble” stuff–and therefore cheaper. I mean, I have a paycheck and all, but it’s still just a summer gig.

We stopped in today, then, to see if the store in town had our stuff in stock (they did, except for one end table) and if we could take it home Right Now (we could, except for the one backordered end table). We brought it home to the old apartment (which kind of sucks, but works out well, since the movers can move it next week) and I promptly put together the new coffee table.

Kids, I Love It. It is bee-yoo-tiful. It has sliding doors instead of an open shelf, so it hides whatever crap we want to put in it. It has a lovely smooth finish, it’s a beautiful color, it’s even a good size (it’s a little big, but that’s probably just in our current place, which hasn’t really had room for a coffee table). Best of all, it’s good, solid stuff. Sure, I had to assemble it, but it’s still good, solid stuff. I mean, there weren’t any wood-colored pieces of cardboard to be nailed to it.

So, we have new furniture. I’ll take a crack at the one end table we could bring home later this week, and the media console…sometime. And I’ll enjoy it, very much. It feels very grown up.

Um, I haven’t been posting much, have I? (Nothing substantive, at least.) That’s because I’ve been really busy. The end of my week saw me scrambling to finish up an assignment at work (it had to be done by Friday), spending some time in the library, working on some journal stuff, visiting with some in-town family, and packing some boxes. Today, that family that are visiting are going to help us trot a load of stuff up to our new place. Our lease doesn’t start till Friday, but we have the keys already and they’re in town with a car, and I just want to drop off things I don’t trust the movers with or that are a pain to box up (like, our china and crystal and our stacks of winter coats). I’m planning to just tuck the stuff away–we’re not moving in yet or anything, we’re just taking advantage of the available vehicle. And did I mention we already have the keys?

A few other notes:

1) I have decided no one should start a sentence with the word “Thus.”
2) Himself knows something is going on–he’s been sort of squidgy for a couple of days now, and I think he’s worried we’re going to move away without him.
3) I am selling a bunch of stuff (furniture-type things), so if you’re in my city, let me know if you want a coffee table or some bookshelves. Or a baker’s rack.

Suddenly my life got really busy. I’m swamped at work all of a sudden, and I have lots to do yet with my journal duties, and we’re moving in a week and a half and I have family coming in this weekend, and basically I’m just snowed under. I keep waiting for things to clear up–since exams, I’ve never really gotten to the point where I can just relax–and it’s just not happening. So I’m resigning myself to being a completely un-fun, un-relaxed, un-leisure-time-accessible person.

Talk to me in two weeks. Maybe then things will be better.

Oh, shoot! I just realized I was supposed to do the Law School Roundup on Wednesday! Ack! I was on my way back into town and it totally slipped my mind. Sorry to all who were looking for the Roundup. In lieu, of a full roundup, I’ll just say this:

Congratulations to all graduates!

(Yeah, that’s lame. I promise I’ll be better in the future. Promise.)

Without going into specifics, I just want to say that today was a pretty cool day at work, and tomorrow is going to be TEN TIMES better. Who ever knew that [seemingly completely dull and boring area of law] could be so COOL?

Look, I’m not per se against the commercials for those medications that are supposed to help certain adults resume certain adult activities. I think they’re kind of silly, and probably not necessary, but I’m not opposed to them on any sort of moral ground or anything.

But I do think they could make them a little less unrealistic. Two porcelain-enameled, cast-iron, claw-footed tubs out in the middle of some rugged beach landscape? With two (apparently) unclothed adults sitting in them? No clothes or shoes nearby? Really?

Do you ever, on what should be a perfectly good day, end up in just a crappy mood? That’s kind of how I am right now. I had a good weekend–I had fun and I was productive, something that doesn’t always happen–and now I’m sitting on my couch feeling awful. First, Himself is boarded right now, and I can’t get him till tomorrow morning, and he was really, really sad to be left on Friday. So I’m feeling awful and guilty about that. Second, Mr. Angst is out of town, and he won’t be back till tomorrow midday, when I’ll be at work, and then he has class tomorrow night, so I won’t see him till late tomorrow–and I haven’t seen him since Friday morning. Third and finally, I started doing some packing today and it’s just so depressing and sad and overwhelming and I don’t even want to deal with it, but I have to, because we have to get packed before we move.

I think there are probably a few other things going on, things that don’t really bear going in to, but they’re contributing, too. So I’m just sitting here on my couch, trying to imagine how I can be productive this afternoon while I’m feeling so icky and blech. Anyone have any ideas?

As law students, we become very used to being very busy and, to a certain extent, we take that in stride. We sleep less, perhaps, or we multi-task; we do less of our reading in favor of going to class–or skip class in favor of doing more reading, depending on the prof. And sometimes, we have to make genuine sacrifices–completely abandoning a class for a week or two while we finish a Note or Comment, or putting journal duties aside while we madly cram for exams. We do mental cost-benefit analyses–how much can I give away here without really hurting my GPA?

This semester, I had to make one of those sacrifices. I admit it–I had too much on my plate. I was doing research and I was TAing, I was doing source and cite and I was trying to go to every class meeting. This semester I also had two papers to write, and, in the end, I skimped on one of them. I felt intense guilt the entire time. I loved the topic, I love the discussion in class, I loved the grayness of the area of law. But the paper–the paper I had problems with. I never felt a connection with my topic, I never really understood what I was arguing, I never really Got It. Instead of spending more time on it, though, instead of arranging to meet with the professor and talk it out, instead of making the effort to do something I felt good about, I punted. I wrote something superficial and wimpy, and what I turned in is something I am not very proud of.

Luckily, as I discovered today, the cost-benefit analysis I did paid off. I got a grade I probably didn’t deserve, and then it got bumped even higher because of my class participation. I am happy that class won’t be the dark spot on my semester–very, very happy. But I am disappointed in myself for not giving the paper the chance it really deserved. So I’ll enjoy the sweet–the grade I never hoped to get in that class–but it will be cut by a bit of bitter guilt.

Why is it that pants which, in black, are not too tight or unflattering to the tushy, are, in khaki, completely scandalous, such that I will never be able to wear them out?

I’m sitting cross-legged on my couch while wearing them, hoping to stretch them out a bit. I need khaki pants for work, you know.

This afternoon, a big thunderstorm rolled in (actually, just as I was leaving lunch–we made it back into the building with only seconds to spare). By the time I was ready to leave this afternoon, I wondered how I would get home, since I didn’t have an umbrella. I contemplated taking a cab, but as I walked outside, I noticed it wasn’t raining anymore. Yay! I thought, I can take the train after all!. Onto the train I hopped, still using my student pass (good for three more days!), popped in my headphones, and tuned out. Until I got to my stop, when I noticed that not only was it not not raining in my neighborhood, it was POURING. Hm. I thought. What to do? I had a few options: make a mad dash to the drugstore and buy and umbrella–and come close to ruining my dry-clean-only clothes; wait for the rain to let up–an unlikely prospect; or call someone to come get me with an umbrella. (NB: Someone = Mr. Angst) Three guesses which option I chose? (Ha ha, see that’s a trick, because there are only three options. So you’d have to eventually get it right. Right? See?)

Anyhoo, that was my day. (No, actually, there was more to my day. Boring, though, and not postable.) I have some editing to do tonight (fun!) and then it’s back to the 9-to-5 tomorrow.

I’m trying to get motivated to start the packing process, but all I really want to do right now is go shopping, finish my edits, and watch TV. Some of those things are good things (i.e., the edits have to get done, right?) and some of them are less good (shopping needs to happen, but it’s not totally urgent; TV watching is bad).

Last night, Mr. Angst and I and four friends dropped a chunk of change eating at one of our favorite restaurants. It was pricey, but it was SO worth it. Six courses, four bottles of wine, and 18 hours later, I’m still reeling from the yum.

Of course, two of the friends we ate with are off today for their summers in another city, so that’s a little sad. It’s actually very easy to get sort of mopey this time of year when all my 3L friends are graduating and moving, and my 2L friends are scattering to the far corners of the country for the summer. At the same time, I’m getting really excited to start working on Monday–to get up and have someplace to go that’s not class, that requires me to actually spend some time getting ready in the morning. I’m basically just really excited to have a regular schedule again. I never thought I’d crave it so much.

Anyway, it’s a beautiful day outside, but I’m spending the afternoon trudging through some cite-checking so I won’t be completely guilty over my lack of progress this week. At least I’m at home–but I think tomorrow’s schedule is going to have to include some library time.

It’s windy today. Very windy. Consequently, I think some construction workers got a glimpse of more than they should have gotten a glimpse of today as I was startled by a HUGE gust while walking to campus. (Yeah, yeah, I had work to do.) I walked the rest of the way hunched over with my skirt hem cluched in one hand.

So here’s the skinny folks.

My summer job is about to start (like, in THREE DAYS, gulp), and that means I’ll be running this blog according to the Summer Posting Policy.

What is the Summer Posting Policy?

Well, for starters, I’m not really going to say much (or anything) about my job, at least not that’s more detailed than, “Gosh, legal research can be boring!” or “I’ve done more writing this week than I’ve ever done!”

I also won’t be talking about my colleagues AT ALL, not even in the most heavily veiled, non-specific ways. That includes my fellow summer associates as well as the attorneys I will be working with.

I might sometimes mention the good food I’ve eaten. I’m kind of into food. But I won’t be blabbing about where, specifically, I’m eating. Or with whom.

OK, so that seems like I won’t have very much at all to write about! Au contraire. We will be moving, so there will be lots of posting about THAT nonsense. We still have Himself, so there will probably be more cute pictures. I still do the Law School Roundup every other week, so that’ll be here. And I will be working on journal stuff all summer, which will SURELY elicit some frustrated, groaning posts about spending the weekend in the library. I’ll hopefully have some time, also, to do some fun reading and see movies and even enjoy some of the fabulous free stuff that goes on in Our New City, so I’ll probably write about those things also.

Basically, the idea behind the Summer Posting Policy is that posts about time at my firm won’t really be all that interesting (or at least very different from posts by any other law student blogger at a law firm) and could create potential problems. So I’m going to write about more interesting things instead. I hope everyone enjoys the Summer Posting Policy.

And just like that, I’m done.

I think I deserve a medal of some kind, though, since I not only took an exam today but also finished the revision of my seminar paper. That’s TWO THINGS I did in ONE DAY. During EXAMS.

Anyway, the point is that 2L is over. Long live 2L! (No, not really. 2L has been a long, sometimes miserable, always busy, usually overwhelming drag of a year–but it’s also a year in which I made some new friends, became closer to some old ones, and really grew into my own academic identity. OK, this post just got a little too mushy.)

Off to have a beer. Or four.

I would be much happier about being done with this year tomorrow if I felt like I knew anything at all about Constitutional Criminal Procedure. Or, as it seems, the economic loss doctrine.

Whimper.

I need to be revising my seminar paper–which I’ve already started, but which needs some work and is due in less than two days, ack–but instead, I’m watching Heroes. Because, duh, it’s the best show on TV.

But I promise I’ll work on my paper when the show is over. Promise.

Dear Self,

You know how, when you start to get too comfy, something always comes along to monkey things up? This is just a reminder that, when that happens, all you need to do is take deep breaths and realize that everything will work out in the end. Promise.

Love!
Me

1) Will someone explain the grand jury to me? I still don’t understand it.
2) The article I did research for last summer has been picked up by a law review. This is very exciting for me. My name! In a footnote!
3) My resume is officially on two pages. I’m not sure what to do about that.
4) Why is a general negligence duty less preferable to a narrower, affirmative duty to comply with some specific standard?
5) We got Himself a new tag (he’s been without one for a while) and now he tinkle-tinkle-tinkles around the apartment. The tinkling woke me up at 6 am today. Boo.

Welcome to this week’s (slightly belated and somewhat unfortunately numbered) Law School Roundup, in which I present posts by law students and soon to be law students full of advice and funniness during exams. (Except for those people on quarters. I don’t know what to do about you guys.)

Enjoy!

• Good tips for managing the load. (Reasonable Expectations)
• Bad choice for landscaping. (A Little Fish in Law School)
• The tiniest handwriting. (Above Supra)
• Seriously. It’s exams. SHHHH. (Cella Bellum)
• Last minute shopping. (Frequent Citations)
• Professors can be funny. Weird, but funny. (katlet)
• During exams, advice of a different stripe. (Magic Cookie)
• Sort of funny apologies. (Peanut Butter Burrito)
• Things it would be helpful to know in advance. (Shelley’s Case)
• Further proof that the law school exam is a perverse pedagogical tool. (Think Like a Woman. Act Like a Man.)
• Yet it’s STILL the only game in town. (Amicus Curiae)
• Remembering old favorites. (Ceteris Paribus)
• Just remember your ID next time! (Clever WoT)
• Listing things just makes it harder. (Equal Process. Due Protection)
• Here’s her! (Transmogriflaw)
• She’s a real, live lawyer now! (Life, Law, Gender)
• But he’s so CUTE. (The Namby Pamby Law Student)

And that’s it for this week’s Roundup. Look for it next week at Evan Schaeffer’s Legal Underground and then back here in two weeks. Good luck on exams if you’ve got ‘em!

“You’ll be able to zip through a lot of work in a short amount of time today.”

God, let’s hope so. It’s already after 5, and I’ve still got a lot to do.

I was up at a decent hour this morning, though not really of my own volition. Our tub was clogged up and none of my tinkering had any effect at all.^[1] Our landlord was great though–promised to be out between 9 and 11 this morning when I called last night. Of course, that meant I had to be up and dressed before 9.

Now I’m on my second pot of coffee (don’t worry, I shared the first with Mr. Angst), and three or four weeks into my Con Crim Pro outline. I know, that’s not all that good. But it’s going quickly. I have to say, I spent more time on my reading this semester than I have since my very first semester in law school, and it’s paying off. I have retained more so I’m relying less on my notes to construct the substance of my outline. My notes are giving me structure–what were those seven questions he posed with respect to Katz? Did we do probable cause before we discussed seizures?–but I’m largely filling in the “law” from my own head. I had the same experience with my Admin outline, actually, and walked out of the exam feeling OK about it.

1. Here’s what I usually do, and it usually works: wait till the water has drained out, scoop about 3 tablespoons of baking soda into the drain, making sure it gets all the way down into the drain, and then pour about a quart of vinegar into the drain. If the soda is well down into the drain, the vinegar will (a) carry it further down the drain while (b) fizzing like holy hell. The fizzing is what works the magic. The soda and vinegar mixture will dissolve whatever is binding the solids in the drain together and hopefully carry those solids away. After you can’t hear the fizzing in the drain anymore (about fifteen minutes) flush the drain with hot water. Repeat as necessary. Plunge if needed. ↩

Admin down. Boo-yah. Per normal, I realized approximately three hours after the exam just how royally I had screwed up one particular issue. ROCK. Really, though, I feel pretty OK about it. But I’m finally at this place where the exam process no longer scares the shit out of me. It’s a test. I have to regurgitate all the things I learned over the semester in rough IRAC format in response to a fact pattern in about three hours. It sucks, but it’s just a thing, right? I went in, I took it, and I left.

So, one more exam to go, plus a paper revision (which is not going to write itself, Self, so you better get cracking on that!) and a bunch of editing. And some shopping for work clothes before I start in approximately ELEVEN days. Gasp! (And a hair appointment, because you know it’s starting to look bad when even random people tell you you have a lot of gray. AWESOME.)

But right now, I’m chilling with the dog, debating about whether it warmed up enough for me to change clothes before I take him on his afternoon walk. He’s awfully cute, too–not necessarily chasing squirrels in his sleep, but certainly smelling them.